Styles that don’t work

I saw this photo in the Saturday insert to The Wall Street Journal. (Scanned in from my newspaper.) The model is, indeed, beautiful.

Nope. Not for me.

Styles that don't work for me.
Styles that don’t work for me.

There was a time when I loved turtlenecks.  See how this model holds her head?  I would have to do that all day long in order to prevent skin rippling down like a Sharpay.

I like the way to jack softly gathers over the hips. That might work for me.

The skirt? Uh, No. Too long; my legs aren’t willowy enough.  I think it might be kinda trip hazard. Besides, I’m sorry, it looks a little like a failed 4-H project.

Perhaps the shoes. But then again, I have a problem with flap-heel when I wear loafers.

I could wear the socks, if they didn’t remind me of kindergarten.

[tweetthis]Okay, I could wear the socks because they remind me of kindergarten.[/tweetthis]

Even the color is wrong for me. I don’t even like it on the walls.

Come to think of it, if that’s where this poor women works, heaven help her.  No wonder she’s got a far-off, daydreamy look on her face.

I’ll take the bracelets. Oh never mind. I think they just might jangle too much for me.  I do like them, though.

What do you think?  I’m dying to know who the target of this is.